Te
In 2009, my
husband, Ted, took his first mission excursion to Managua, Nicaragua and the
man I thought I knew was changed forever by what God revealed and had him
experience on that trip in July. Ted was grieving and expressing his difficulty
with being back into the United States and the conversation of Nicaragua became
a daily, somewhat unwanted, topic in our home in which I greatly tired of very
quickly! Where the heck is my husband? Why is he not happy and thrilled to see
his wife and baby boy of seven months? I could not comprehend the mental and
emotional anguish Ted was enduring and, frankly, I was incredibly frustrated and
did not want to understand. After one
visit, how could this place called Nicaragua take up so much of my husband’s
time and energy! What about me??? Hello!
No sooner
had Ted taken “trip one” than “trip two” was scheduled six months later in
January 2010. Two trips without his family to Nicaragua in less than six
months! Really God? I was bitter and every time the word came up, you know
N-I-C-A-R-A-G-U-A, I would feel this fear of abandonment welling up in me as if
it was the first time I ever felt that emotion. To say that I was livid and
scared was an understatement.
Ted came
home from the second mission trip and this time I noticed something different.
My husband has always had intensity, but, now it was gentler and softer and
presenting with a fire I had not seen before. Ted had fallen in love with
Nicaragua and it became clear to me that I would have to submit (resentfully)
and experience this place. But God, I am not called to missions in a 3rd
world country! I am comfortable right here in St. Louis, MO doing whatever YOU
call me to do. Just not 3rd world missions! Thankfully, God had other
plans.
In July of
2010, I begrudgingly left my 18-month-old son (Teddy), my parents, family, and
friends for eight days in extreme hot, humidity, mosquitos, no air
conditioning, no hot water, and water bottles to carry daily because the water
is too filled with bacteria to drink. And it happened…
I fell in
love with Nicaragua too and after the first mission I knew God was calling us
to spend and serve more time in this beautiful country. On my third trip to
Nicaragua, Ted and I spent roughly 8 hours away from the team in Managua to
share time at Brazos de Amor and I fell in love instantly with the kids and
dedicated staff. The one-day taste was not enough for me and I could not wait
to return in January 2012 to invest time with the kids and staff. I dreamed of
living on the property and serving in whatever capacity needed. Why? I was once
too an orphan, although I have wonderful parents that have been married for
over 50 years.
I am
overwhelmed with joy to be joining the team at Brazos de Amor! God has
abundantly blessed me with a PhD in Life Experience (aka of “What Not To Do”),
an MA of Professional Counseling, and BA in Human Resources Management. I
thoroughly love the ministry that God has given me in St. Louis of counseling
individuals (children, adolescents, teens, and adults), families, and couples. What
do all these boasting of credentials and professional experience have to do
with taking a full-time missionary position? Not much without JESUS at my core!
Words will
not do justice to how humbled I am that He has chosen us / dare I say ME / for
such a time as this. 10 years earlier, I was lost, numb, and in desperate need
of Jesus Christ. God saved me and continues to sanctify this forever-grateful
sinner and saint. For me to express my excitement is quite easy due to the fact
that God has wired me to be an extremely emotional human being! I am a
Christ-follower in need of a Savior every second of the day, wife, mommy,
daughter, sister, sister in Christ, friend, and Licensed Professional Counselor.
As far as the rest of God’s testimony for my life (at least for today), looks
like you will just have to come visit me in Nicaragua!
For I am not
ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who
believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek. For in it the righteousness
of God is revealed from faith for faith, as it is written, “The
righteous shall live by faith.” Romans
1:16-17
