To judge or not to judge, that is the question.

I received a phone call from a potential client and before anyone steps into the office I require that they review my web site to see if I am a good fit or not. Stating the obvious, I am already asking for someone to judge me. So a couple days later I received a voicemail message stating that both individuals, male and female, reviewed my information and the boyfriend felt that I would be too judgmental based on my Christian beliefs. I had to chuckle but then posed the question to myself... Am I judgmental? The answer is a resounding YES!

As I was completing my Gestalt Training, one of the things that resonated with me was a comment the wise and knowledgeable Ed Harris, PhD (therapist of over 30 years) stated, "The process of counseling is not judgmental, however, therapists are judgmental". I didn't know what to do with that statement and honestly, tried to keep that comment in my closet of denial for a long time. Why? Because, truth about me is I am judgmental and truths can really stink and really hurt! 

Can there be an upside? I think so! If I did not judge than my gift of encouragement and affirmation would not exist. If I did not judge than I would not lovingly speak into people who love me and clients who expect a return on their time and investment. If I did not judge and share with you what I am hearing or seeing by asking questions for clarity than you should find another therapist! If I did not judge than God would never be able to grow me in this area of depravity and I would continue to shrink the cross of Christ. If I did not judge... I might be dead! 

Believe me, I want to accept everything as the gospel truth when rolled off of someones' tongue, but, I would be failing you and myself if I did. One of my favorite chapters in the book of James speaks directly to judgment and gossip (a whole-nother blog) as quoted below;

For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so. (James 3:7-10)

Let me repeat... People (myself included as I confess and repent), these things ought not to be so! Christians judge and sin and sin and sin and sin and sin... I am no better and totally deserve eternal torture. 

BUT, Jesus! Need I say more?